These rules are collected from William Safire’s October 7 and November 4, 1979 “On Language” columns in The New York Times:
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- Remember to never split an infinitive.
- A preposition is something never to end a sentence with.
- The passive voice should never be used.
- Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.
- Don’t use no double negatives.
- Use the semicolon properly, always use it where it is appropriate; and never where it isn’t.
- Reserve the apostrophe for it’s proper use and omit it when its not needed.
- Do not put statements in the negative form.
- Verbs have to agree with their subjects.
- No sentence fragments.
- Proofread carefully to see if you words out.
- Avoid commas, that are not necessary.
- If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
- A writer must not shift your point of view.
- Eschew dialect, irregardless.
- And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
- Don’t overuse exclamation marks!!!
- Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
- Hyphenate between sy-llables and avoid un-necessary hyphens.
- Write all adverbial forms correct.
- Don’t use contractions in formal writing.
- Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
- It is incumbent on us to avoid archaisms.
- If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
- Steer clear of incorrect forms of verbs that have snuck in the language.
- Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
- Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
- Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
- Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
- If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole.
- Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.
- Don’t string too many prepositional phrases together unless you are walking through the valley of the shadow of death.
- Always pick on the correct idiom.
- “Avoid overuse of ‘quotation “marks.”‘”
- The adverb always follows the verb.
- Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; They’re old hat; seek viable alternatives.
August 17, 2018 at 9:32 pm
Love this one, AJ. I’ve saved it in my favourites folder – there can be no greater compliment.
I hope you had a restorative and fun writing retreat.
August 21, 2018 at 12:27 pm
That’s awesome, Karen. Glad you liked this post =)
August 18, 2018 at 12:38 am
William Safire was one of a kind and still missed by me. It’s amazing no one could pick up that column and do what he used to do. Sigh.
August 21, 2018 at 12:28 pm
I’m sure the fact you miss him would be the perfect compliment to him, though, Jacqui.
August 28, 2018 at 2:55 am
I’ll have a laugh over that with him when I get up there.
August 18, 2018 at 1:29 am
This is a classic. Love it.
August 21, 2018 at 12:28 pm
I think it’s brilliant. We have such a weird language.